Restarting Apache workers (not graceful restart) without restarting loadbalancer and using python

Question

I have two processes running as Apache servers on two different port numbers. I also have a failover server on another port and I am using the embedded Apache load balancer on windows. Both of Apache servers are doing the same task. There are servicex, servicey and servicez on both portnumber1 and portnumber2. I want to automate restarting them in this way: I want to enable the failover server and be able to restart servers at any time without restarting load balancer and without losing the current requests. I want to wait for finishing current requests. I do not want to do graceful restart, because I have heard sometimes it cannot read the whole changes. Is there any safe way to handle the situation via python code? For example, Drain the server1 and 2, when they answered all their current requests, Stop them, and then Restart them? During these steps failover server will handle all the requests.

I also wonder if there is any predefined python library to do the process.

An overview on the services:

<Proxy balancer://balancerName1>

    BalancerMember https://example.com:8443//servicex hcinterval=10
    BalancerMember https://example.com:8444//servicex hcinterval=10

    BalancerMember https://example.com:8445//Maintenance status=+H
</Proxy>

<Proxy balancer://balancerName2>

    BalancerMember https://example.com:8443/servicey
    BalancerMember https://example.com:8444/servicey
</Proxy>

<Proxy balancer://balancerName3>

    BalancerMember https://example.com:8443/servicez
    BalancerMember https://example.com:8444/servicez
</Proxy>